I wanted to do a halfassed album cover and instead got distracted tracing kemono artwork and drew my fursona on top of everything and i got depressed when it didn't look good so i went to sleep and today (or was it yesterday?) i opened up the .pdn file and went like "oh this isn't so bad maybe i should polish it up a little" and this is the result.

*sigh*

I can hear this image.

Part of the reason of making this post is to show off the cute pixel border embellishments i made that got cropped out by the circular avatar border on this site, I really hate how rounded profile icons are the norm everywhere now.

One thing I realized while making this piece in particular is that because of my fursona's design and my inability to add depth to art it's very easy to mistake the sclera as being the red part of the eye. I'll have to live with that for now because if I tried to fix it by putting more detail into the iris it would just end up looking worse. The sclera being white also makes it blend with the body fur and look like it doesn't exist, I'm pretty sure that could be fixed by shading the fur around it but that being a physically impossible task I'm afraid I'll have to live with it too.

Technicalities aside, I would say this is the first time I feel I've managed to accurately portray everything I wanted on a drawing. I think it's weird, that I draw my character looking like I do, instead of making him look happy, giving him an ear to ear smile, or making him look .°˖✧ *: cute ･ﾟ˖✧ like any other furry would... I draw him looking sad, and lifeless. A fursona usually representing an idealized version of oneself, often that means discarding any sort of negative trait and leaving only the positive ones, creating an empty vessel of happiness that feels nothing but joy and likes singing about the power of friendliness and hugs... and I do the opposite of that, portraying only negatives. I'm not saying that's inherently better by the way, I would assume it's probably worse in some ways, I just think it's weird and I feel conflicted whenever I think about it. I would like to portray my fursona more positively sometimes, but I rarely feel like that and I think it's best to be genuine with a character that's supposed to represent me. I really don't know what I'm talking about.

On a lighter note, I managed to make him look a lot like a girl in this drawing and even though I didn't initially intend to I'm honestly not bothered by that. He's a pretty girl.

In other news I'll try to work on making my neocities page look nice so that I can treat it as a proper blog site. Until I can afford to pay for mp3 embeds and hyperlinks I'll (sadly) have to keep abusing NG for the blog feature though, so I guess I'll stay here for another while. I'm not gonna post anything here, since I deleted my account and lost my scout status I have little incentive to go through that pain again, particularly considering everything I make includes an amen break or two so anything I post would get instaflagged. Anyway, if you want to listen to this thing I've made you should do it before I inevitably destroy it.